Month: March 2021

Resuming

/ Ayana / Leave a comment

Hello.

I still don’t feel 100% well since I have a bit of a hard time breathing and having some light-headed episodes but I resumed doing the remaining commissions today. ^^;;

I feel like utter shit, falling quite ill and depressed for the past few days because I felt useless. I didn’t get to do much but Rin insisted that I should stop with the negative mentality of counting how many days I didn’t do x or post x. It’s true though that I tend to always look for how long something “should” take. 😦

ehhhhh

…I always have this fear of being seen as “lazy” or tardy because I like being efficient and punctual and wanting everything to go according to my plans. That’s why I hate falling ill or any other unexpected events such as depressive episodes and stressful tasks /sighh//

Delays are the worst.

But yes..I am resuming on finishing the remaining commissions I have left. Some are very detailed so I’m sorry if I’m going to take a bit longer than the usual. OTL

I might have to CLOSE commissions temporarily because aside from having some commissions that I need to finish, I want to be able to draw personal projects again without worry. As I said previously, I want to do AUU Chapter 7 , TSOU, Mirror! Pup comics, other comic and illustration stuff. Unfortunately, it’s hard to focus on them when there are some commissions that I need to finish, gahhh.

I really wish I was good in multitasking but after some blunders, I eventually realised that I can only do one thing at a time. ^__- \

But y’know..it feels good doing commissions. I tend to draw ygo a lot so I find it super fun when people ask me to draw their OCs or chars from series I’m not familiar with. It’s a good change of pace and exciting playing with different colours. :’D

It also led me to reflect that I should put more effort into illustrations. So hopefully this year, I can make more original and non ygo illustrations.

I do apologise if lately, I have been unusually idle and inactive for this month. I wish I can draw so much and post so many comics and illustrations but life and physical conditions have been getting in the way.:C

Anyway, it’s wayyy past my bedtime and my eyebags have eyebags already so if this post doesn’t make any sense, blame it on my lethargy, haha. I’ll edit them tomorrow or smth..I’m so tired.

Goodnight.

Ill

/ Ayana / Leave a comment

Hello.

Unfortunately, I haven’t been able to make much this week. I haven’t been feeling well, so I wasn’t able to.

I get dizzy and my breathing has been very shallow. Every breath is an effort to do. I can’t explain it well but there’s this tightness in my chest like it is blocking the airway, ugh.

I really hope it’s not COVID. I haven’t read the latest literature on covid 19’s effects on anemic patients but anemia does make the immune system more susceptible to infections and viruses so…yeah..it would suck so hard if I got hit by covid. sigh..

I still can smell and taste a bit though so hopefully it’s not covid.

(I’ve just been staying home so as to not affect anyone if ever)

I wish I can recover soon so I can start finishing and drawing stuff. Being sick is a pain in the ass. >_>

blurb…again.

/ Ayana / Leave a comment

Hello.

Maaaann, I’ve been posting mostly commissions here for the past month which isn’t bad exactly because I’m currently finishing commissions but I terribly miss rambling and writing self-reflections here. It feels like this blog is just filled with pictures and no words, lol.

I need to find some time to draw AUU chapter 7 and other personal drawings/projects (which are A LOT lol).

I feel sad that I’m taking long with stuff. Like, the last time I uploaded an AUU chapter was last October and I get worried about the readers. They probably think I’m a slowpoke and ditch the fic, gah. I hope not.

(I miss my deathshipping babies so FRIGGIN’ MUCH (ಥ_ʖಥ) .I want to draw Ryou and Mariku again huhuhu…..)

Not to mention I’ll be pretty busy irl tomorrow and on some weeks in April ORZ.

sigh.

I have nothing much to say for today tbh. I’m super tired. (so much for missing on writing things lol) Maybe it’s fatigue catching up to me. (:::з」∠)

But I’ll try to draw more non-commission related stuff and write about nonsense like the usual next time if I can.

^__^b

Commission 11

/ Ayana / 2 Comments

I’ve been irritated at Gmail for bugging on me and not sending my mail to some of my clients. >_>

ughh..

(( To my clients/those who commissioned me since clients sound too posh for my pleb self haha; Rest assured though that I send the full artworks to your e-mails straight before I post them to social media so please notify me asap if you haven’t received them but still saw them in my blog or smth. ^^. ))

Anyway,

I finished this full illust (chibi) commission for Darkfluffy98 who wanted a dark/guardian angel Jounouchi in a bright environment. Thank you for your commission, dear! <33333

Commission 09

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Hello.

‘been super stressed about toxic family members lately pft.

Anyway, finally finished another detailed commission for Disgraced-Doctor-Junkenstein <333 (Thank you for your commission!)

Here are their OCs, Janku, a demon (left) and Vulture (Right).

They’re quite fun to draw and colour, heh. :3C

warmups kul elna things 1

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These are warmups from yesterday before I resume doing commissions so my stuff won’t be as rusty as before.

I’m trying to finalise design of TKB’s mum. I don’t really have a name for her but I don’t think she needs one in the Ancient Egypt AU lol. I just need her character for some scenarios and comic ideas I have that revolve around Kul Elna. ^^;;

I was thinking of TKB resembling his mother a lot aside from his eyes. ^^

Her design was inspired by Nubian and Ethiopian colours and fashion which are quite colourful compared to Ancient Egyptian fashion. The latter often consisted of off white and or cream-ish robes/dresses with maybe some non white accent . I wanted to emphasise the “foreign-ness” or Ostracism of the Kul Elna people from the average Egyptians by having their clothes be very colourful compared to the rest of the Egyptian community. You can see also see that her clothing is tattered. Kul Elna didn’t look like a bustling and rich village to me. It seemed to resemble a ghetto or a slum area (remniscent of Upper Egypt it seems ?) so I think they were poor and because of prejudice (I mean literally no one seemed to bat an eye on why a village was deserted lol) they didn’t get any job opportunities and some resorted to stealing.

(It’s really a very grey area for me with Kul Elna’s reputation for being a “village of thieves” as they were descended from Royal tomb builders.Like how did it come to that? So many questions I want to make a story on. )

For some reason, me and Rin really can’t visualise how TKB’s dad would look and I joked that maybe we can just rip off YGODM Mr. Bakura’s design and just put dark skin on him like what they did with Atem and Priest Seto, lol. And this scribble came up.

It…really doesn’t suit him, haha.

It’s just a random joke though. That would be quite unoriginal andTKB’s mum’s design has the same fringes and hairstyle as Ryou and his dad anyway so we can’t really use that lol. I was thinking in the story that maybe TKB’s dad was killed before TKB was born and his mum had to raise him as a single mother. Not sure though…

…hmmmm…

I’m still brainstorming ideas with Rin. I’d like to make more comics on TKB’s childhood and the community of Kul Elna itself before the massacre happened. I think there’s so much more to tell about a village of “thieves.” (apparently pfft….I really don’t understand why Takahashi would give this kind of backstory to TKB and let him and his people go to hell in the end like..wut kind of fucked up justice system does YGO have that Akhnadin, the one who perpetrated the massacre gets to go to the friggin afterlife and TKB is destroyed and goes to hell? ) then again these kinds of things happen irl sighhhh. ‘So depressing but rich and powerful people often get away with things that the poor cannot. they just fuck em over again and again

It’d be nice to tackle classism, poverty, prejudice and racism in this AU. I’ll have to find more time for it though gahh..fuck. ORZZZ

yo

/ Ayana / 8 Comments

I haven’t been able to draw for this week due to being super busy irl ORZ… Sorry about that. I’ll get to everything next week. it’s been a super stressful one for me.

Anyway,

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It's easy to be nice when you're rich... – Lee Ji-an (My Ahjussi/ My Mister)

I’m currently watching this beautiful K-drama called, “My Mister/ My Ahjussi” on Netflix and I really love it <333 I recommend it to people who are struggling, depressed and want to watch something relatable and healing. ^_^

It starts slow, though. It’s heavy on setup for the first two / three episodes so quite boring but gets good as the episodes go on. I like K-dramas but all too often they seem to focus on rich people and opulence too much that it just gets…err….unrelatable? haha. Personally, I don’t think its good to always focus on those since it shows a very materialistic worldview.

I get it that there’s a lot a character can do if they can afford almost anything but it can be limited also because the answer is always “Why didn’t they just buy ____?”

I want to see more common, middle, low working class people in the drama And no, not those “poor” protagonists who are poor apparently but can afford the latest Samsung phone and wear so many fancy looking clothes LOL. (srsly) and this series was recommended to me and I did the same to Rin and my dad and they seem to like it. It’s nice and comforting seeing just simple people going by and struggling in their lives and not people in power, with good looks and lotsa money and other opulent shit like that. It gets tiring.

Also IU plays Lee Ji-an (FL) soooooo..yeah, it cool. heh. <333

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And tried to design TKB’s mum. she looks so off and wonky and what even is bandana physics? >_>

I have more comic ideas for TKB’s childhood with his mum and I want to draw them so bad but I need to find time for it ORZ

Commission 07

/ Ayana / 1 Comment

Yoinks//

I’m sorry if my activity has been super low this past two weeks. ORZ

I’ve had a lot on my plate irl unexpectedly and it made me slow and delay some things but I promise to finish all the commissions remaining as soon as possible. ^__^b please be patient ;w;

Here’s a Malik crying over Bakura commission for NintendoGal55 ❤