I was listening to the Rev Left podcast, on one episode regarding mental health and I was struck with what the interviewee mentioned about turning your own struggles into compassion especially for others.

Sometimes I end up wallowing in my misery though, gah.

But I like that idea of helping other people who struggle on the same stuff I had / have been experiencing.

One thing I realize growing up is that there’s no such thing as finding happiness in life and by that, “permanent happiness” in life because these are just fleeting. It’s not good on a long term basis especially since they’re very dependent on external factors /cough/ material wealth/cough/

…And what people generally yearn for is finding meaning in their lives. Like, you go push through with life despite all the stress and adversity when you have a sense of purpose and direction, beyond the transient state of pleasure.

And helping people is one way for me to have that sense of purpose. Turning my own bad experiences as a tool to give way for more connection, empathy and solidarity. ^^

ANYWAY, emo stuff aside, I did another sketch comparison from last year, lol.

I often make art comparisons not as a flex, but it’s a good way for me to reflect on my mistakes, where did I go wrong, what I overlooked, etc.

and how my art style has changed.

GODS, it’s been a while since I drew Ryou, too. Heh. :3

HMMM…so with the 2022 one, the face was very small and the art style is more reminiscent of the 90s and YGO with the small sharp nose and the mouth being too close to it, haha.

He’s a total baby face there., honestly. :”D

2023…..

I made him look more mature and defined in the 2023 version, haha. OFC I still headcanon Ryou as a soft furby and he still is in my art, but I like where my art style is heading now compared to before?

I still struggle with proportions so I’m obviously gonna find this 2023 cringe next month or so, lol but I want to make characters look more mature in my works. As much as I adore the ygo, inuyasha, 90s /90s-ish art style, I want to add more 2000s and late 2000s influence with my works, haha. Especially artists with the likes of Yana Toboso, Range Murata, Masashi Kishimoto, etc. VNs like Fata Morgana has also inspired my art style lately.

(90s-2000s anime and manga series are the best for me haha Ngl. ESP 2000s haha. )

I used to be an utterly impulsive bitch when it came to talking about art styles come to think of it. I sounded like some rigid and stiff Victorian lady in one of my old posts, gahhh. I’m so sorry. ORZ

I tended to judge people and things so hastily back then and it’s still something I catch myself doing from time to time and currently trying to curb that shite but I can say this for sure, from my experience, as the years go by and more influences come in, art styles…change. As much as there is a distinct style for certain artists, it doesn’t remain stationary imho.

Even with YGO for example since that was mostly what I drew all these years, haha. Seeing how Takahashi’s style changed from when he was working on the manga in SJ vs his latest works especially in the later art book. It’s remarkable. It is proof that yeah he improved but also, his art style developed into something different. ( it’s also softer rather than the pointy ones in his original manga. )

Regardless, that is also something I need to take note of. I end up becoming too dogmatic and stubborn to the point it hinders my development.

Ah well,

it’s late I should sleep, gah.

Goodnight.